Don’t Judge Me. Please.

We’ve been going through an interesting series at evening church this month. It’s about Biblical responses to common secular concerns. Like abortion, wealth (aka the “prosperity gospel”) and homosexuality. Tough topics to tackle and definitely worth tackling.

Actually, they’re really tough topics to tackle. It is hard to preach about them the Bible without coming across as, well, preachy. And none of them do not have simple, pat answers from scripture. Most of the sermon is involved in explaining the research that was done.

Homosexuality is a particularly tough one. I know several gay people, and at least two of them have been hurt by church antics on this topic. And it’s a current topic in today’s media because a) it is currently illegal for gays to marry and b) there is a current debate about whether we should allow it. Typically, the church would rather not. It has good reasons for saying so, only some of them stemming from scripture. The rest are from looking at history: allowing secular gay marriages tends to be the start of a slippery slope which would marginalize or even punish churches for not eventually following suit.

As always, church goers must remember that accepting gay friends as they are is first and foremost what we are called to do, as followers of Christ. It is absolutely not our role to judge and condemn them. That is the task of  the Holy Spirit. Recent debates show many many churches seem to have forgotten this.

But that’s not what I really wanted to post about. In the message about homosexuality, we also came across passages about marriage and divorce. This was because the pastor chose the sub-topic of nurturing children as one reason against gay marriage.

Unfortunately, this hurts me, too.

I’m currently separated. My ex-wife and child are living a life without me and she’s determined to keep me away. Sadly that doesn’t do my kid any good. But in this message, I hear condemnation for not being able to make my marriage work.

I don’t need to hear that. Not at church.

I know there are other couples at church who are on second or third marriages. I was wondering what their reactions were to that teaching. I wonder how to ask.


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