It is not possible to be annoyed at other human beings. It just hurts more when it is someone who knows you more than average, someone you would call a friend.
I am in the situation where I usually get home from work at 7pm. Almost without exception, other people in my church get home earlier. It makes church-oriented evening events difficult: I either have to leave work early, or I’m late. People in my church seem to consistently forget this and right now I’m very tired of reminding people. Turning up at 7:30 can only work for me if I skip dinner. Except most things that are “for dinner” aim for 6pm.
My bible study is having an end-of-year dinner tonight. The various elements of that for people to provide for were farmed out last week, a night I felt staying home. And I got “drinks and nibbles”. Fine. I can do that. And then told the host this morning that I wouldn’t be there tonight before 7:15.
Whilst he was right to complain I hadn’t said anything earlier, he didn’t need to belittle me about it, either. Whether that was the intention, that’s what I felt when I read the reply. This on top of the brusque “Why aren’t you here?” last week.
It made me angry and upset. Despite what he thinks, I really haven’t given him leave to do that to me. I’m also not going to deal with it over email or internet chat. That needs to be in person.
Meanwhile, it has rather emotionally disrupted my day.