I don’t see my ex. She’s done her best to hide from me, basically. I don’t mind. After things started heading south, interactions with her were always me versus her-and-her-family. The imbalance made it difficult, and there were a few times I refused to interact because it was unbalanced like that.
Well, I got to see that’s still upright.
My church fielded a bit of an impromptu choir for a local community carols event the other day. What I’d completely forgotten is that my ex’s grandmother lives about a hundred metres from the usual venue and often attends. With her family.
I spotted them whilst I was arriving. Fortunately, they didn’t see me. It also helped I arrived in company. I warned those in the choir who I thought should be aware and one of them happened to see where they were sitting, which was quite a ways from where I was. So far so good. However, they were pretty close to the stage and that meant they were not going to miss that I was in my church choir. Oh.
As it happened, my ex and her family got a bigger shock than I did. I didn’t look too much or too hard at them. After all, I never went in the hopes of seeing my son (I did get a few brief glimpses). I had been wondering if my ex had been saddened and upset by the breakup more than angry – I think I now have a better idea that the answer to that might be ‘yes’.
I didn’t go over to them afterwards, didn’t speak with them at all. I saw her sister roaming the crowd later, apparantly looking for someone. Me, perhaps? I dunno. I wonder what would have happened if she had been and had found me.
At the very least, I’ve now salted what should usually be some good memories for them (three specific Christmas Carols) with a bad experience. Maybe they won’t forget it in a hurry. I don’t want to be vindictive, after all, especially as I was not doing anything to deliberately antagonise them.